I want to be rich and hire a maid!

Ah, but, who knows if that will ever happen. Guess I better put the chocolate away and get cleaning!

Hmmm….

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The poor organized man. How did he wound up with a messie like me. I have taken over his neat areas. He only has his drawers now. LOL!

Speaking of drawers, I HAVE found a way into his bathroom drawer already! ROFLMBO! Hopefully I can be strong and keep my panties out if his drawers!

OK, off to clean…yeah right…you know I am going to go look for that chocolate bar!

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I am the type of person who hates when I have to carpool. I am always “planning ahead.” I think to myself, “What if they need to use the bathroom when they come to pick me up?” Then I hear the theme song from psycho. LOL!!! You know what I am talking about, don’t you? Anyone? Am I alone in this? I already have my excuse in play. LOL!

Let me tell you…I need help…seriously. LOL!

OK, so yesterday began the “bedroom challenge.” ROFLMBO! Have I started? Uh, not! Will I today? I hope so! Do I want to…yes and no. I am not giving dates anymore. I always fail. So, we will be on the bedroom challenge until your untidy leader gets her act together!

OK, I need some chocolate…chat with you later!

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OK…so when these things are goin’ on in el’ fridgeO…well, ya know…

• You have some old fruit that could be donated to science for a new type of penicillin.
• Your magnets have gone on strike.
• Your Baking Soda is fuzzy.
• There is something in there with a hairdo.
• Your milk is still in a glass container from the 50’s.
• There is a hardened mass at the bottom that may be used to cut diamonds.
• You would rather use the fast food ketchup packs than what’s in your ketchup bottle.
• You swear that something is living in the veggie bin.
• Your lunch meat has become jerky…and you didn’t plan it.
• You can smell the contents of your fridge from the living room.
• When there is a package in there that says cheddar, but you swear it’s Lindbergh.
• And…when what you thought were brussel sprouts are actually icicles.

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2. If you find your scissors by feeling around your dining room table until you feel something hard of the correct shape, it’s time to clear off a few things.

3. If you need a gas mask to open your fridge, you might think about throwing away some of those leftovers.

4. If you drop your comb in the bathroom and you pick it up with more hair than is currently attached to your head, it’s time to sweep.

5. If your feet stick walking across the kitchen floor, it’s time to mop.

6. If it takes more than 20 minutes to find your kids when you wake them up in the morning, it’s time to have them clean their rooms.

7. If you haven’t seen the floor of your car for a week because of the Happy Meal litter on the floor and ‘wash me’ is written in the dust on the outside of the car, it’s time to take the hint.

Copyright © Lara Velez, All Rights Reserved

OK…your turn…don’t be shy!

You Are Very Messy

You are a slob, and you really don’t care if other people know it. You don’t love messes, but you just can’t be bothered to clean on a regular basis. While being messy and disorganized feels easy, it’s probably making your life harder. Maybe it’s time for you to get a maid.

Are You Messy?

1. Do you make panic runs to the garbage can for fear that someone has thrown away something “important”?

LOL! I have ACTUALLY done this!!

2. Could you feed a family of four for more than two weeks from supplies found inside your sofa?

OK, I seriously think I could! ROFL!!

3. Have you put off purchasing a refrigerator until you can find a self-cleaning model?

This could be a serious money maker…anyone interested in colaborating??

4. Have you written to Dow to ask how you can get your Janitor in a Drum out?

Huh?? LOL! Blonde moment…

5. When you hear the phrase “cleanliness is next to…” do you fill in the blank with “impossible”?

YES!!! LOL!

6. Do you own more than 5 sets of keys you had made when the current set was “missing in action”?

LOL! No Comment…

7. Is there something growing inside your refrigerator that puts your houseplants to shame?

Oh, yeah baby! I have some MAJOR experiments going on…pennicillian has NOTHING on my fridge…that’ll be a “fun” challenge to share pics of…ROFL!

8. Have you ever put off a diet because you lost the book?

ROFL!!!!! Among other things…

9. Do you put off redecorating the den because you haven’t seen the floor in so long that you’ve forgotten what color the carpeting is?

I have tile only…LOL…funny though

10. Do you know laundry can reproduce in a hamper?

This is the question of life…WHERE does it all come from??? Wouldn’t it be AWESOME if money in the purse did that?? LOL!

11. Do you have at least three bags of “stuff to sort later” stashed somewhere in the house?

3??? LOL! More like 10!

12. Have you ever lost something in your bedroom, like the bed?

LOL! All the time! ROFL!

13. When visitors suggest that they’ll throw their coats on the bed, do you offer to set up a cot in the hall?

Visitors…LOL! Yeah, OK…Too much clutter…LOL…

14. Does your storage system consist of 30 boxes marked “miscellaneous”?

ROFL! No comment…

15. Have you ever gone to put up the holiday decorations, only to discover that you hadn’t taken them down from last year?

Hee Hee Hee! We only do inside decorations….BUT…one year they were up til April! LOL!

OK….If you answered yes, to two or more of the above questions…ROFL…Never fear…help is HERE! Join Thou Shalt Clean! Here you will find support, tips, and encouragement top help you through! LOL!

Hi, my name is Lara and I am Organizally Challenged!

Copyright © Lara Velez, All Rights Reserved

Have a wonderful and laughter filled day,

I don’t wax floors because …
I am terrified a guest will slip and get hurt then I’ll feel terrible (plus they may sue me.)

I don’t mind the dust bunnies because …
They are very good company, I have named most of them, and they agree with everything I say.

I don’t disturb cobwebs because …
I want every creature to have a home of their own.

I don’t Spring Clean because …
I love all the seasons and don’t want the others to get jealous.

I don’t pull weeds in the garden because …
I don’t want to get in God’s way, HE is an excellent designer!

I don’t put things away because …
My husband will never be able to find them again.

I don’t do gourmet meals when I entertain because …
I don’t want my guests to stress out over what to make when they invite me over for dinner.

I don’t iron because …
I choose to believe them when they say “Permanent Press”.

Please feel free to add more! LOL!